Finding the Blessings

Most of you know that Steph was in the hospital for about a week, mainly due to her MS.  While we were there we had great nurses and doctors and as hospital stays go, it was a good experience.  But while she was there, my attitude was attacked by the enemy.  I had hurt some feelings because I had made a request to not have a whole bunch of phone calls or texts while we were there, that if I had an update that I would let the couple of people know and they could pass the word along.  Come to find out it had hurt feelings.  That was never my intention and I can’t tell you how frustrated it made me.  I dwelled and stewed on it until I started getting angry.  On top of that one other thing happened that I won’t go into detail about, but I was thinking “REALLY!”  I just need you to help!  I stewed on this at least until Sunday, and let me tell ya I was fuming. 

It wasn’t until Monday morning when we were doing our devotional with our kids, reading our Streams in the Desert, that I realized that the enemy was attacking me.  I have been trying for so long to remember the blessings and to understand that we are going through a storm and we praise God in the storm.  I took my eyes off of Him for just a min and let Satan in to attack.  Praying and doing our devo Monday morning helped me to bring it back. 

I knew that I had not done anything wrong, and what I had asked for was not out of line.  I know that when trouble comes it is an opportunity for Satan to strike.

We have been so blessed through all of this, our pastor and a couple of other folks came up to the hospital and prayed for Stephanie.  That very same evening she came home.  Thank you Lord for listening.

We had family and friends take care of our kids while we were out.  I praise God for the people in our life.  The positive ones and the negative ones.  We love them all.

Thank you Lord for my job at Acxiom, thank your for the team of people that I work with.  They brought us a bunch of frozen casseroles and meals that all we have to do is pop in the oven and bake.  Thank you Lord for providing for our needs.

Thank you Lord for giving us people that are obedient to YOU.  They gave us a gift out of their obedience, but what impressed me the most is them listening to you, that warmed my heart so much more than the gift itself.  I praise you Lord for putting people in our life that WANT to listen to you and don’t look at it as a set of rules that they MUST follow. 

Father, you have given us so much and blessed our family abundantly.  We have shelter, we have food and you have blessed me with one job and further blessed me with the opportunity to work somewhere else as needed!  God you are amazing and we love you!

We are not perfect and I don’t want you to think we are.  You make get sick of hearing all of this, but I write these because I want you to see we struggle with many things, frustration, finances, being a dad or mom, being a kid.  I try to teach my kids to find the blessing in everything, and the blessing may not be for you it may be for someone else.  Your reaction to a situation could have a huge affect on someone elses’s  attitude.

We love you guys and we thank you for reading.  Keep praying for us, because you know, that is how my wife keeps getting better everyday!

The Continued

So I am sitting in the hospital room and figure this is a good time to continue.

So we get home from her tonsillectomy and get her settled in, we make it home in time to intercept the kiddos so they get to see their mom right off.  She is hurting bad and just trying to swallow is a chore.  She is eating the popscicles and sherbet, keeping her throat really moist.  She has a rough go at it.

Friday I am working from home because I have to take Emily to the orthodontist Friday afternoon

Saturday I took Hannah to basketball practice, which she is really good at by the way.  Took off work so that could stay home with my girl and take care of her.

Sunday church.  Did I mention that we have an awesome church family?  Well if I haven't, we do!  Been blessed so much by these people.  Had Angela bring my kiddos home.  She has been making us pies and cakes and all kinds of goodies.  She is an awesome neighbor too!!

Monday took Em to another Dr.

Tuesday took Stephanie back to Dr.

Wednesday got home a little early because Thursday is Thanksgiving and just about as soon as I got home, Hannah comes in and says, "Daddy I need to go to the ER and get some stitches."  The girl wasn't lying she fell and cut her hand open.  She is so tough didn't even cry.  Didn't have a lot of gas so we went to North Metro.  Thanks ER folks for getting her in and getting her stitches!!

Thursday morning Steph is still running fever and guess what, Emily has the stomach bug.  Needless to say we did not go anywhere for Thanksgiving.  We usually go to my sisters house or Steph's dads.  This year we were going to try and hit both.  But you know what I can find the blessing in this too.....We didn't have to go anywhere and we got to just sit there and not do anything.  It was kinda awesome.  Thank you Lord for the rest.

Friday and throughout the weekend, Steph hurts, a lot.  I went to at Ropers, (which is the best place to eat in the world, yes that is right, the world), and work.  And do you know what my wonderful wife does even though she is hurting and not feeling good?  There is a little boy in 5th grade that rides the bus with my kids and comes over to play with Clay, he wants to spend the night so Stephanie lets him.  This is not an 'easy' kid but he is very respectful at our house and because he knows what is expected acts pretty good.  Anyway Steph shows him attention, and some love and lets him stay.  He feels very welcome.  I love my wife so much, she is so giving.

Saturday I go over to moms and get her stuff out of the attic for my mom and run some errands for her.

Sunday, go to church and teach those wonderful KidLife kids.  They are awesome and we love them so much.

Monday have to take Steph back to the Dr.  They did an X-ray of her chest they did see a little bit of stuff in there and send her back to the ENT just to make sure she is healing correctly.  2 Drs this day...whew!  The ENT said that her throat looked fine and gave her a stronger antibiotic.  (Not sure I have mentioned, but since October this is the 6th cycle of antibiotics she has been on)  They are not working.

So we get to Friday.  I am at work and my girl calls me.  She is running a temp again and just sounds horrible.  Short of breath cant talk long.  I told her to call Jody and Greystone Medical Clinic (awesome clinic) and find out if she can be seen.  She said that she could.  So I head home and pick her up and take her in.  Jody is looking her over and is trying to get in touch with her Neurologist but ends up speaking to a Hospitalist and she gave him everything that she has done and kind of the story over the last couple of months.  He said that he would direct admit her.
So now here we are at Baptist Springhill and the Drs are doing a lot of tests, not normal tests, which is good because what she has going on does not seem to be normal.  I just pray that God totally heals her body and totally takes everything away.  Everything that has gone on has happened for a reason we are here right now in this spot for some particular reason.  Stephanie said to me today, I am not sure what I am suppose to learn from this storm yet.  I said sugar, I don't either, but this storm may not necessarily be for you, it may be for the rest of us.  She said I know.

Now lets talk about how awesome my kids are.  They are totally awesome.  Emily had an all region band tryout this past weekend that she was excited about a couple of weeks ago and then just decided that she did not want to do it.  After questioning why, she said because I don't want to add anything else to what we have going on.  OH MY GOSH!!  My heart was so filled with joy because of the selflessness, but at the same time sadness because my daughter felt like she had to give up something to make our lives easier.  She also was not able to go to a party on Friday night because we were on our way up to the Hospital and you know what she said to her mom?  It's ok
Hannah and I after her basketball practice one day this week, went looking for basketball shoes. We stopped by one store and they were $62 Nike basketball shoes.  She saw the price and she said, I think we need to look around some more.  Lets go to KMart and Wal-Mart.  Really I thought to myself, you are 12.  My heart just keeps being blessed.  We found a pair for $22 at Wal Mart and she said.  I think these are the ones that I need because I am not really even sure if I am going to make the team next year.  Seriously, you are 12 and you think like an adult.  And you are aware of our money situation and you are OK with it.  Love that girl
Clay, that boy never ceases to bless and amaze me.  His love for his mom and his sisters and me is beyond measure.  God has really given something special to that boy for people.  He is so understanding to be 10 years old and so caring about other people.  He wants to make sure that is Paw Paw and his Giggy love God.

Emily has taken the lead on doing our daily devotional with her brother and sister because that is what we do. I am literally tearing up right now because I am realizing how blessed I am to have the children God has given me.  We are so blessed to have the family members help us when we need it Steph's parents, my mom.  We are so blessed to have the friends we have come and do for us whatever we need.  We are so blessed to have the neighbors we have to take care of a whiny puppy because my beautiful girl has made him rotten while she has been sick by holding him all of the time.  We are SO BLESSED to have the church family and NLC in Cabot that we do, and a Pastor that really loves us.  God I am overwhelmed right now with all of your blessings in this one major trial.  There are so many things that we could look at that could get us down.  Window that is duct taped on the van, truck that one door that won't open and a transmission that is about to go out, health, all of the things to do in a day and not enough time to do them, medical bills, med bills, finances.  But you know what, NONE of this gets me down.  Every need that we have has been met, our shelter, our transportation, food, clothing.  We have been blessed with so much more than our needs and our God loves us so much.

Don't get me wrong, I do get frustrated, we get frustrated as a family.  But then God does things that reminds us he is there.  Whether it be friends after taking their son to the hospital because their foot is broke asking if they can bring us a burger; old high school friends coming up here to take care of business so that I can run some errands, or people just being there to listen.

Where ever you are right now thank God for it.  I don't care what you are going through, God has brought you here and He will pick you up love you.  I wish I could really express more right now but I think the best way to explain it is to say, that I do not have words to describe Him and what He does for us on a daily basis.  I love him and and I fall short everyday on giving him the praise he deserves, but he still loves me despite my shortcomings.
Stop and praise him right now.

I love you family!

PS: If I mispelled anything or it is not gramatically correct please forgive me.  I am usually a stickler for this, but this is a blog its 10 and I am tired in a hospital room

We are very blessed-regardless

About a week ago Stephanie started getting this nagging headache and she had finally had enough.  It went from nagging to full on pain, no it wasn't a migraine.  She went to see our primary care doctor and she sends her to the ER because she wants to rule out any kind of meningitis, and everything is closed so we head to the ER. That was Friday the 12th of November.  We went in and the nurses at Baptist ER were awesome.  Believe it or not the dude nurses were the best; she had 2 of them I believe, and they were really on top of things.  Tim was the first one that came in and started her IV.  The lab lady came in and he asked her for another syringe and she opened it, tried to had it to him and then he said would you please open another one and this time sterile.  I was impressed because of the little things like that.  The other guy his name was Dustin so that automatically made him a winner!!

In the meantime this is the weekend that Clay is suppose to have his birthday party, the boy turned 10.  (all my kids are in double digits now)  He was going to have a couple of friends over and while I am driving in from work to meet Stephanie at the doctor's office, I get a phone call from the wonderful Emily P.  She wanted to make sure she had the directions correct to give to her husband to bring their little boy over.  I said, "well.......and proceeded to explain to the wonderful Emily P what was going on.  She asked if she needed to wait a little bit and I said that would be great.  My Steph calls me back to tell me they are sending her to the ER so I call the wonderful Emily P back to let her know and she asks if Clay can spend the night over there if that would help, and I said absolutely!!!  Meanwhile my mom is at my house watching my kids because a little boy also rode the bus home with Clay.  I am trying to get in touch with this little boy's parents so they can get him and take him home, and we have some great neighbors down the road that have Hannah and she is going to spend the night with them.  Emily is going home with my mom.  So I am saying all of that to say, we are wonderfully blessed that God worked that out so quickly that my kiddos all have someplace safe to go and are with people that love them.  Thank you God for blessing us with family and friends.

So anyway they did a few tests on her and didn't come up with anything so we left there not knowing anymore but she found a little relief.  Thank you Lord for the blessing of some relief.  We went home and she hurt pretty good over the weekend but it was bearable.  I tell you the girl amazes me with her pain threshold.

Tuesday she was scheduled to have an Echo-cardiogram before her surgery on Thursday.  She was on her way to the test, and she was hurting so bad and it was hard for her to turn her head and she just about passed out so she took herself to the ER at St. Vincents.  No help at all there, didn't give her anything for her pain, basically she went in they did a CT and the nurse came in a little later and said, "ok you can go home."  I was a little upset to say the least and I was very slow to anger.  NEVER SAW THE DR when I got there, I was so angry.  I calmed myself after a bit, but I was angry.  It was like no one was even taking her seriously, she was hurting..ugggg..... But I do remember the blessing in this and she does too.  God is in control of this situation just like all the others.

The next day, Wednesday, we went to see her Neurologist whom we absolutely love and wish every doctor that we ever saw was just like her.  Kathryn Chenault and her staff are the best.  I cannot say enough good about them.  So we go and see her and we discuss a few things.  She wants to check Steph's inter-cranial pressure.  We head over to Baptist and the way they check this is via a spinal tap.  They did give her some pain meds to help control the headache.  They take her back and and do the tap and she comes out.  Everything went pretty ok. (I did get the chart and read it, you can do that its yours).  She has to lay on her back for I think it was 4 hours to make sure it doesn't leak.  She did find some relief after this was done which is huge.  Thank you God for the trials to find some relief.  You are awesome.  Stephanie amazes me with her faith.  Thank you Lord for a great neurologist and the huge blessing we find in her.

I sure do love this girl! 

We head home to get ready for the next morning so she can have her tonsils taken out.

We get back to the hospital at 7:00am Thursday morning the 18th.  She gets checked in and is ready to head up to pre-op.  We say a little prayer and they come in and get her ready with all of the IV and the other pre op stuff.  The doctor finishes within about 20 minutes and they bring her in recovery.  She does really well and  we get to head home.  She is hurting pretty bad, but thats not the end of it.  We have a few more trials coming  up which I will write about a little later.  I am tired of writing right now as I am sure you are tired of reading!  This will be continued a little later.  Love you guys!!

Duct (Duck) Tape is Great!!

Got  home last night from Emily's band concert, which she rocked, and had to get the window up in the van so that (1) Steph does not continue to get cold in the morning when she is driving (2) the seat does not get wet with the possibility of rain.

So the boys, Clay and myself, go to work.  We take the door panel off and push the window up and it won't go up all the way.  The cable that is attached to the window is wadded up so I had to cut it so we could push the window all the way up.  Well you guessed it, we used duct tape to tape (or as Clay calls it Aflac tape, get it dad Aflac, Duck?  Love that boy)  the window up from the inside.  Really doesn't look that bad but yes, it is now completely a redneck van.  The horn doesn't work because I switched out the horn relay and put it in the park lamp relay.  The window is being held up with tape.  No drive through anything for us for awhile....LOL

Have a great rainy Tuesday.  Lord thank you for all of your many blessings, we love you Amen.

Dusty.

Well we have tail lights!

YAY!!!  So after I posted the first blog and sent everyone the link on facebook, a friend of mine saw the post and her husband works at NAPA in Jacksonville.  He read my post and I am pretty thankful he did.  I called and chatted with him for a few minutes and he actually confirmed for me what I had wanted to do to begin with but was a little apprehensive because I did not want to fry anything else.

OK so underneath the hood if have a little box for Fuses and Relays.  I did notice that there was not a relay in the slot for the Park Lamp Relay.  I had gone to the parts store and asked them, do I need that one?  They said I didn't because they could not find it in the computer (this was in Cabot not at the NAPA store.) So this was always in the back of my mind about this relay.  I had already put a new switch in so I knew that was not the issue.  (By the way I have an extra one if any of you need a headlight switch for a 2003 Dodge Caravan.) Changed out the light bulbs, no go.

So I am talking to this guy at the NAPA store, I am not naming him because I didn't ask him if I could, and he said to take one of the other relays out like for the horn and plug it in for the Park Lamps.  This is the confirmation I needed to know that I was not going to fry something.  I did that and now the lights work.

SOOOOO I go to the parts store, take out the relay, take it in, and say "I need one of these".  They looked, and they don't have it.  Not that my van doesn't need it, but that they don't have it.  I am going to have to get it from Dodge.

So now we don't have a horn.  I told Stephanie, and she said, "That's OK, we don't need it.  Since the window won't go up, I can just yell out the window at people if I need them to move!"  I love that girl so much.

We got an unexpected blessing as well yesterday.  If you read this you know who you are and we are so very thankful.  We love you and thank you for listening to God, that is way more important anyway.

God is so very good to us, I really do not know where we would be today had it not been for Him.  With all the stuff that goes on with us, He has totally taught me to be patient and wait on Him.  Don't think I don't get frustrated, because I do, I am human and has one of our pastors sons said one time, Dad I was born into sin. (he said that after he punched his brother...LOL)  But God always wants us to turn our eyes on Him so that H knows that we know who is in charge!

Now to get the window fixed!  Stay tuned...

Hope it doesn't Rain

Today I had to come to work, Steph has the van.  Hope it doesn't rain while she is out driving around.

Dear Lord, thank you for the stories, I am not sure our family would be very interesting if you did not give us these stories to tell. Amen

Hope Steph doesn't get wet while she is out driving around today.

Oh, because of my very first blog post, a friend of mine on facebook has a husband that works at a parts store, I have to call him later.  He may know what is wrong with the lights.

prayin.

Dusty

The Van-Will it still go?

Ok so I posted on FaceBook that I was going to start a blog about my van, not complaining but frankly this has turned into humor.  Let me start off by saying that we are super blessed to have a  vehicle that we can carry our family to church and actually haul a couple of other kids around when they need it.  We love taking our kiddos and others to church. 

So we bought the van from a person at our previous church after someone rear ended our other one about 3 and half years ago.  The van was perfect and we loved it! We still have about a year left on it.  Well a few months ago started with brake pads, not a big deal, easy to install.  We went a couple of months and Steph was driving down the road and the van just died.  No warning, just died.  She tried to restart it and nothing.  With the key on, all of the lights on the dash worked, the radio worked; everything else worked. So I know it is not the battery, (which would have been an easy fix). 

So Steph is "stranded" at the gas station and a nice old man comes out and helps her a little push the van out of the way.  (I was at work in Conway, don't judge).  He gives her the name of a 'real good mechanic'.  She calls the towing company here in Cabot and has the van towed out to his house.  -Sidebar State Farm insurance in Cabot, you can call the towing company and have it billed directly to the insurance company if you have emergency roadside service. end sidebar-  What I didn't know is this guy is what my mom called a Tent Mechanic.  Anyway, the van was there for about a month and he could not ever figure out what was wrong with the van.  He changed this and that, ordered the book and all he could think of.  So we went a month and didn't have our van.  Again an opportunity for us to be blessed because we have friends that live in Bald Knob that are pretty awesome.  They let us borrow a car of theirs that they do not usually drive.

Oh did I mention in the meantime, a week after my van broke, my truck broke down, in the middle of moving.  I was a little upset on the inside, but my son was with me and I do call myself a Christian and I literally thought, this is a great time to be an example.  Thank you Lord!!  Clay asked if I was OK, and I said yes I am fine, just another opportunity for us to Praise God.  It was hot because this was the first part of August, so we went around to the back of the truck put the tailgate down, and man it was hot.  We sat down and a good breeze started blowing, I looked and Clay and said, "do you feel that?" He asked "What?" "I said God, He just cooled us off." God gives us so many opportunities to praise him, but I think most of the time we get caught up in the stuff.  My brother, Tommy, is great I had my truck towed to his house, he had my truck fixed within the week.  It was the fuel pump.  I love my bubba!

Oh yeah, and did I tell you you that the car we borrowed from our friends that the belt shredded a week after we got it?  Oh and that same day it shredded I went to get a new one.  Gave the parts store the information about the car and they sold me a belt.  I was trying to put it on for an hour or so, called the parts store back just to make sure I got the correct belt.  They said yes and so I went back to try to put it on.  Did I tell you that I had to go to work that afternoon?  Well I called my buddy back because he was in Cabot and because he is pretty awesome he came by to help me.  He helped me work on it some and then I got the parts store to send the schematic for the pulleys but he had gone by another store and got a schematic.  The two did not match.  I went back to the first store, found out they did sell me the incorrect belt so I went to another store and got the correct belt.  Seriously after I had spent about 3 hours working on this car, it took all of 5 minutes to fix the care with the right belt.  Praise the Lord for my friend David, we got to spend some dude time together, and learned a few things in the process.

OK so I am driving the car and Stephanie had to go a couple of weeks later to get her port put in for her new medicine for her MS.  So in August one morning we get up go to the hospital to get her port put in, everything is on schedule, surgery goes well she gets out of recovery and we have to go across the street to the infusion center for her first dose of Tysabri.  So I take her to the infusion center and they get her hooked up.  She gets hungry so I go to McCalisters and get her a potato then to Olive Garden for some raspberry cheesecake.  If you wonder why I am telling you all of this stuff, my point is how many times I get in and out of the car all day.  I still have to get back to get Clay to baseball practice after I get him from the in-laws house.  So Steph finishes her infusion, we are done!!!  We get in the car get ready to go and the key will not turn in the ignition....REALLY!!!???  This is what does me in?  A moment of woe as me.   I call David to see if there is something special that I need to do to get it to turn, if it had ever happened to him.  I try for 30 minutes, I even have a blister on my finger.  So what do I find?  A crescent wrench.  I hit the key a couple of times and low and behold, the key turns in the ignition.  Praise God!!!  Since I am now 30 minutes behind I call Pops and Gig and they are going to bring Clay to practice.  I brought Stephanie home, got her settled.  Go to the ball field to retrieve my girls and meet up with Clay.  So I get there get Clay going on practice then ask Aunt Monica to keep an eye on him so that I can run Stephanie scripts to the pharmacy so that I can pick them up after ball practice.

I go back to get Clay and an hour or so later I we leave practice and go and get the meds.  I pick everything up, and go home and start getting the kids their showers.  I give Steph her meds and we go looking through them and she did not get one.  I call the pharmacy and tell them we did not get one of them and they said they did not have it.  I told them that I know that they have it because it was the only one written in blue ink, they said oh yeah here it is.  The doctor had made the prescription out for September 18th instead of August 17th.  I had to call the doctor on call to get them to call the pharmacy to change the prescription.  They took care of it and I had to go back to the pharmacy to pick it up.  I finally got home around 9:30pm to eat supper.  WOW what a long day.  Sorry I got off on the tirade, but this all stems from the van.

So I have my van towed to another mechanic, they changed the ignition switch.  The first guy had put a new starter in it, both of which I purchased so I have already spent almost $200 on the van.  Nothing has fixed it. 

Well I called the Dodge Corporation to see if there was anything they could do as far as assistance to help me get my van fixed. So I ended up having it towed to the Dodge place in Conway.  They have to hook it up on the main computer to see if they can figure it out.  Well they did figure it out, it was the Powertrain Control Module, or the main computer.  Guess how much that cost $980, yep that's right!  Huge amount, but you know what?  God took care of us then too.  He still answers prayers guys!!  This was taken care of for us, not by the Dodge Corporation because it was out of warranty, but through God's people!

When we left the Dodge place after our van was fixed, we noticed that the reservoir for the coolant had been removed by the 1st mechanic and he didn't bother to put it back on, and God is so good that he made it a semi-rainy day and Steph turned on the wipers and they did not work.  We were right there by the Dodge place so we took it back and told them what was wrong. I got a call later and they told me that it did not have the wiper relay, and they had one laying around and so they put it in at no charge, thank you thank you thank you Lord!  I was in Conway and I was afraid to drive the van all the way back to Cabot without the reservoir so I sent a text to a friend that lives in Conway and asked him to help me put it back in.  He has tools and he was on the way home.  Are you seeing a trend on how God provides?

So here we are in October.  Stephanie was driving to church one night and noticed this guy following her for a pretty long time.  She got to the church, a little scared, and got out of the van to the guy calling out to her, "ma'am, ma'am, umm your tail lights are out, please be careful."  Steph told me and I thought, well that will be an easy fix, probably a fuse.  Well its not a fuse, all of the lights work except the tail lights and the front parking lights.  I changed out the switch, changed the bulbs and no fix.  I am not real sure what to do there.  So yesterday she calls me when I am on my way to Ropers to work, job 2, (still providing, God is so good).  The window will not roll up, I was like hmmmmmm.  So I was totally thinking electrical, or that it had just come off of the tracks or something.  Well I get home take the panel off, and well, the cable was all wadded up and broken.  At this point I am a little stressed but also at the same time thinking this is getting funny and a little ridiculous.  I have about a year left on the van, and now you are going to fall apart.  Get in this morning to go to church with the window down because I cant get it back up and on the passenger side sliding door some of the seal is coming off. 

So with all that said, I posted on facebook this morning I am going to have to blog about the van.  I need a name fore it now, the van.  I am going to try to keep this updated with what happens to it.  What fixes it or if it finally bites the dust or if it some time we are blessed with something else that either replaces it or is in addition too. 

Stay Tuned!

Dusty Hankins